Unexpected Experiences

Solo traveling has changed me in more than one way. It’s given me time to appreciate more of the little things, to enjoy every single moment even when I’m not in great company. It’s even made me more independent! Solo traveling really changes you, and I hope you can take this leap of faith and take this step for yourself.

GET READY TO DISCOVER YOURSELF

Have you ever thought, “how can some people have the courage to leave everything behind and just go on the other side of the world in a snap?” Well, it is a lot more attainable and easier than you think – the world isn’t scary, it’s exciting!

I’ve always enjoyed my alone time: eating at a restaurant, shopping, going to the movies… being alone is freeing and really peaceful. So, it made sense that traveling alone had crossed my mind more than once, but there was never really a right moment to take that leap.

Well, at least I hadn’t created that “right” moment for myself, yet. There is a huge difference between loving to spend a day alone and literally going to another country alone. I like to think that I had it in me though, the timing just wasn’t right.

Traveling solo is completely different than doing it with someone, everything changes. You are responsible for every one of your decisions, in a good and bad way I guess. It’s scary, powerful, freeing, enriching, inspiring, different, unique…

FEELING LONELY AT TIMES IS OK

You can also feel alone at times, empty, or the want to share great experiences with someone, overwhelmed…

But to be honest, you will never always be alone. If that is your fear, I can promise you one thing: it is SO easy to meet people to travel with or just do some activities with for the day. I’ve stayed in a lot of hostels, and almost all of them had the same vibe: “let’s go together!”

And I have met some amazing people with whom I got along really well and am still in contact with today. So, if you’re scared of feeling lonely super quickly, just book some hostels and join in on all of the fun!

There is this connection between most travellers, you are bound to have at least something in common: travelling.

SOLO IN LONDON FOR… A TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT!

My first ever “solo trip” was in 2018, I was 21 and I went to London for 4 days; to see Taylor Swift. TAYLOR SWIFT. I am a huge fan of hers, and if you dislike her, we cannot be friends.

She was on her Reputation Album Tour and none of my friends loved her as much as I did, so I went there alone. Funny story – I started a FundMe page, for whoever wanted to participate in me going to live my dream, and I raised almost 100€ (btw this is your sign to be cheeky in life)!

Anyway, I think I was way too excited for this weekend trip to be scared, or think about dangerous things that could’ve happened. I had a blast. Not only because I got to see TayTay, but because wandering around London felt like a moment out of time, a little escapade with myself, visiting and eating only what I wanted.

I hadn’t really thought about solo traveling as “it changes you”, I just enjoyed it so much!

AN INSTAGRAM OOPSIE…

Another funny story about this weekend (bare with me it was my first concert ever). I was SHOUTING the whole concert. Singing at the top of my lungs, and had the brilliant idea to post the videos directly to my Instagram stories.

I only realised the next morning, with my inbox full of people dying of laughter, that ALL we could hear was my excruciating voice and hardly even Taylor… Yep, you got it – embarrassing!!!

Solo traveling changes you indeed, but not in every way. I still do random clumsy things like this all the time.

This was an “introduction” on solo traveling, let’s say. It was only four days and an hour and a half plane ride from where I lived. The real solo travel started when I decided to pack up my life in my 70L backpack, and head to the other side of the world, completely alone.

THE BEGINNING OF REAL SOLO TRAVELING

New Zealand was my first destination all by myself. I volunteered to work for a local family for a couple of weeks; I was able to visit Auckland and the beautiful island of Waiheke on my days off. To be honest, I didn’t feel that free because I still had to eat with the family, tell the parents when or if I was coming home… Not a bad thing, just stating that I wasn’t completely solo.

After that, I spent a little more than a week solo, in Rotorua, Sydney and Bali. That was very nice, I only did what I wanted to, ended up in “funny” situations and could only blame myself for it!

My first night in Bali was scary. Like the type of scary that keeps you up all night. I flew in at midnight and took a taxi directly to my hotel. It was my first time ever in an Asian country (that famous culture shock, remember?), and I realised that I had no one to call if anything happened to me.

If you overthink things, you’re the only one making them worst

So, I took pictures of my taxi’s license plate, his phone number, his face. I even shared my live location during the ride and sent everything to my family. I was a walking mess full of anxiety. Then, I got to my hostel and there were only men that kept speaking Indonesian between themselves and laughing with (or at?) me. I felt completely alone and scared.

Oh, but let’s make this story even better: at 1:30am, a guy knocked on my door and said “HOUSEKEEPING! Open the door!” What in the world? Housekeeping??? At 1am????? Turns out, my toilet was leaking downstairs, but believe me when I tell you that I did NOT open that door! I told him I could fix it if we just communicated through the door, which we did.

I barely slept, all I could do was imagine the worst case scenarios. The next day, I still felt a bit off. Then, I felt more stupid than anything else, because I realised I had just been overthinking. Everyone was so nice, caring and not scary at all, like most people in Asia.

This was the only time I felt scared, like actually scared for my life (yes, this is Jess the drama queen). Besides this, I can only think of a few times where I felt, not even scared, but uncomfortable. As I’ve said before, I am considered to be a fearless person.

So, maybe if I’d started to imagine the worst things that could happen in situations, I could’ve become scared, panicked and would’ve lost all my common sense.

I think that’s the key, trying to not overthink situations. Especially when you know you’re in an overall safe country, even safer than Europe! And this is how solo travel changes you – I don’t think in this way AT ALL anymore.

It’s ok to be the party pooper!

When I was in my hostel in Koh Tao, I think I was seen as a party pooper. Every night, people would go and have drinks together. Or, even spend the day at the beach together but that wasn’t my mood.

I wanted to stay alone, I needed some me-time for a week, I wanted to only do what I wanted, not follow everyone around. I mean, this was the point of my solo travel, right? Anyway, when I’d say no, they’d all put their sad faces on. They’d try and save me from my “desperate” loneliness.

What is so wrong with doing things alone? What don’t they understand? Do they not enjoy their own presence enough to stay by themselves?

Maybe I’m the weird one for not understanding them, but being abroad and alone is so exciting!! Surely, you’ve had the same thoughts as me in your daily life, if you’re the kind of person that enjoys his solo-time, I want to encourage you to not care about it too much. Just do what is good for you.

And if you’re not this type of person, I strongly recommend you start enjoying your own company; you’re stuck with yourself until the day you die so might as well like the person you are!

SOLO TRAVELING IS NOT SCARY

Overall, fear should definitely not stop you from traveling solo; just look at me, I’ve had 0 bad experiences, only fears of something bad happening. Just try to not overthink things, keep a lucid and conscious mind, trust your gut, and you will be fine!

The positive experiences you will have are far greater than the fears of something bad happening. Plus, the most anxiety you’ll feel is prior to your departure date – once you’re there, all of the fear magically vanishes and transforms into excitement. Solo traveling changes you, and for the better!

I am not trying to sugar-coat this for anyone, because there definitely is a lot of danger in this world and it obviously depends on where you go. But, these are my honest feelings and experiences on solo traveling! Here you can read my tips and tricks on being cautious and even better, feeling safe!